Aperture Laboratories wishes you luck on your next testing!
The new Portal-inspired “Where There’s A Wall…” double-sided tee offers a bit of friendly encouragement from your friends Aperture Laboratories.
At Aperture Labs, we care deeply for the mental well-being of our test subjects and take every opportunity to offer supportive platitudes to distract from the futility of their efforts. We find that distracting test subjects from their imminent and painful deaths makes them more cooperative, though no less disappointing.
Subject, if you are ready to begin your test, please proceed to the “Where There’s A Wall…” t-shirt page to make your purchase in the appropriate size and style for your gender and human developmental stage. Those test subjects who survive may proceed to the Redbubble store for additional testing.